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What do you call spiders who just got married? Newly-webs.

emmahircine post What do you call spiders who just got married? Newly-webs. from onlyfans

What do you call spiders who just got married? Newly-webs.

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What sort of elf lives in a can? A sprite

emmahircine post What sort of elf lives in a can?

A sprite from onlyfans

What sort of elf lives in a can? A sprite

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What do you call two octopuses that look the same? Itentic..

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Itentic.. from onlyfans

What do you call two octopuses that look the same? Itenticle.

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How do you make an elf horny? Fairy moans.

emmahircine post How do you make an elf horny?

Fairy moans. from onlyfans

How do you make an elf horny? Fairy moans.

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RIP boiled water—you will be mist. 😭

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RIP boiled water—you will be mist. 😭

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Why are spiders so smart? Because they can find everything o..

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Why are spiders so smart? Because they can find everything on the web.

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I know a lot of jokes about retired people, but none of them..

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I know a lot of jokes about retired people, but none of them work.

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How can you mend a broken pumpkin? By using a pumpkin patch.

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How can you mend a broken pumpkin? By using a pumpkin patch.

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What did the two pieces of bread say on their wedding day? I..

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What did the two pieces of bread say on their wedding day? It was loaf at first sight.

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What did the accountant say while auditing a document? This ..

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What did the accountant say while auditing a document? This is taxing.

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What do you call someone who won't stick to a diet? A desser..

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What do you call someone who won't stick to a diet? A desserter.

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What kind of car does a sheep like to drive? A  Lamborghini.

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What kind of car does a sheep like to drive? A  Lamborghini.

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I told my doctor I heard buzzing, but he said it’s just a bu..

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I told my doctor I heard buzzing, but he said it’s just a bug going around.

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Stop looking for the perfect match…use a lighter.

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Stop looking for the perfect match…use a lighter.

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Maid in heaven 😍

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Maid in heaven 😍

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Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road? Because it got..

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Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road? Because it got stuck in a crack.

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***Want it soft or hard?*** 🖤 new gothic bundle of goodies,..

***Want it soft or hard?*** 🖤 new gothic bundle of goodies, featuring never before seen video! 💗 new pink bundle of cute content, feat never before seen video! Only one spin each 🎡

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Why did the baby strawberry cry? Because its mother was in a..

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Why did the baby strawberry cry? Because its mother was in a jam.

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Looking for that earring i lost

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Looking for that earring i lost

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Shouldn’t the “roof” of your mouth actually be called the ce..

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Shouldn’t the “roof” of your mouth actually be called the ceiling?

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I was going to tell a time-traveling joke, but you guys didn..

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I was going to tell a time-traveling joke, but you guys didn’t like it.

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What kind of music do chiropractors like? Hip pop.

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What kind of music do chiropractors like? Hip pop.

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What's a crafty dancer's favourite hobby? Cutting a rug.

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What's a crafty dancer's favourite hobby? Cutting a rug.

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Why did Waldo go to therapy? Because he needed to find himse..

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Why did Waldo go to therapy? Because he needed to find himself.

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What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.

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What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.

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What does "Rockin' Robin" do when she's bored? Tweet.

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What does "Rockin' Robin" do when she's bored? Tweet.

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It takes guts to be an organ donor.

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It takes guts to be an organ donor.

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What did the flowers do when the bride walked down the aisle..

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What did the flowers do when the bride walked down the aisle? They rose.

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Dogs can’t operate MRI machines. But catscan.

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Dogs can’t operate MRI machines. But catscan.

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I’ve been thinking about taking up meditation. I figure it’s..

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I’ve been thinking about taking up meditation. I figure it’s better than sitting around doing nothing.

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