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emmahircine posts

I wonder what the Fatui will do about Scaramouche leaving. ..

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I wonder what the Fatui will do about Scaramouche leaving. He left quite a big hat to fill.

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eBay is so useless. I tried to look up lighters and it gave ..

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eBay is so useless. I tried to look up lighters and it gave me 13,749 matches.

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***Useless Fact of the Day:*** **The average adult spends m..

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***Useless Fact of the Day:*** **The average adult spends more time on the toilet than they do exercising.**

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This morning my alarm went off. I thought it’s sell-by date ..

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This morning my alarm went off. I thought it’s sell-by date was tomorrow…

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Art thou maidenless? #ai art

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Art thou maidenless? #ai art

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What’s the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer ..

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What’s the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts are two dollars, but deer nuts are under a buck.

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Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coluoring. The ..

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Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coluoring. The doctor says I’m OK, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.

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A plateau is the highest form of flattery.

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A plateau is the highest form of flattery.

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Just burned 2,000 calories. That’s the last time I leave bro..

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Just burned 2,000 calories. That’s the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.

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I’m reading a horror story in Braille. Something bad is abou..

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I’m reading a horror story in Braille. Something bad is about to happen… I can feel it.

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My colleague can no longer attend next weeks Innuendo Semina..

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My colleague can no longer attend next weeks Innuendo Seminar so I have to fill her slot instead.

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Did you hear about these new reversible jackets? I’m excited..

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Did you hear about these new reversible jackets? I’m excited to see how they turn out.

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Did you hear about these new reversible jackets? I’m excited..

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Did you hear about these new reversible jackets? I’m excited to see how they turn out.

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A man just assaulted me with milk, cream and butter... How d..

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A man just assaulted me with milk, cream and butter... How dairy 😫

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I Renamed my iPod The Titanic, so when I plug it in, it says..

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I Renamed my iPod The Titanic, so when I plug it in, it says “The Titanic is syncing.”

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Last night, I dreamed I was swimming in an ocean of orange s..

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Last night, I dreamed I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. But it was just a Fanta sea Report

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How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it

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How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it

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What did the sushi say to the bee? Wasabi.

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What did the sushi say to the bee? Wasabi.

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Dude 1: “Hey bro?” Dude 2: “Yeah bro?” Dude 1: “Can you ..

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Dude 1: “Hey bro?” Dude 2: “Yeah bro?” Dude 1: “Can you hand me that pamphlet?” Dude 2: “Brochure”

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How do you console an English teacher? There, their, they’r..

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How do you console an English teacher? There, their, they’re

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**Summer** needs to cum  ***SO BAD*** 🥵🥵 Do you think you wi..

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Where do rainbows go when they’re bad? Prism. It’s a light ..

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Where do rainbows go when they’re bad? Prism. It’s a light sentence

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The reason that aliens have never visited us is because our ..

The reason that aliens have never visited us is because our solar system has received terrible reviews. We only have one star.

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Do you know my favourite d&d class so far?

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Do you know my favourite d&d class so far?

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Someone asked me to name 2 structures that hold water. I wa..

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Someone asked me to name 2 structures that hold water. I was like, well dam.

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